Pillow Talk

Me-"I didn't think it was possible, but you've managed to take lame to a whole new level."
Brian-"What?  What did I do?"
Me-"It's not what you did, it's what you DIDN'T do."

Oh are these words not classic?  This exchange was not done in anger, mind you, I was actually laughing when I said it.  Laughing, though not to be mistaken as kidding.  I was NOT kidding.  This is the last conversation I had with my husband before finding him asleep in our bed.  Thinking that he would still be awake after I finished brushing my teeth was foolish of me.  When his head hits that pillow there's no turning back.  He's gone.  I'm ready to explain myself and I find him just lying there, peacefully asleep.  That's so annoying.  My first thought was to whack him with a pillow and demand that he stay awake to talk to me.  My second thought was to kiss him goodnight whether he woke up or not and just let it go.  But then if I do that I'd just lie there in the dark thinking about it.  I'll blog.

I'm well aware of my feelings and whether or not they are misplaced.  In this case they are not.  He's totally lame.  But I'm having other issues as well.  I don't think he (or anyone who is not staying at home with their kids) realizes how much work it actually is.  You would think that I've got all the time in the world to sit around and play with the kids and do whatever I want.  This is not the case.  I feel like I am busier now than I was when I had a 'real' job.  We wake up, I make breakfast.  The kids get a bath, brush their teeth and get dressed.  I clean the kitchen.  I feed Riley, I put her to bed.  Clean up time for the kids' toys.  I do preschool with Ella and Aiden during Riley's nap.  Riley wakes up, and finally I can play.  I've got 30 minutes until I have to make lunch.  That's right, lunch.  We've been up all morning and it's not until almost lunchtime that I can play.  After that I make lunch, give Riley another bath and clean the kitchen...again.  Clean up toy time again.  Next, nap time.  My favorite time of the day.  Brian is home briefly to help put the kids down.  I can sit with him for about 10 minutes before he has to leave again.  It's 2pm now and I can finally get my shower.  When 3:00 rolls around Riley is the first to wake up.  Next is Ella and then Aiden.  If I want to go anywhere it's always 4 before I can get out the door.  Change diapers, put on shoes, pack a snack for the car.  I've only got an hour and a half before I have to be home again to make dinner.  Our afternoon outings consist of the grocery store, errands or the park.  When we get home I make dinner and usually have it all ready and plating food when Brian walks in the door.  He bathes the kids.  I clean the kitchen as much as I can before the kids' bedtime.  Mostly just the dishes get left.  I feed Riley, put her to bed and we alternate with Ella and Aiden.  Once the kids are down I start laundry.  We usually let the chores (what chores?  I already did everything!) go until we are ready to go to bed.  I fold the laundry while Brian finishes the kitchen.

I have this theory.  He lives here to so he has to help.  Dishes in the evenings and take out the trash.  I get that he works and everything but come on.  Like that's so much to ask?  So who does everything else?  Me.  Clean every other room in the house including bathrooms, keep it tidy all day, keep toiletries and food fully stocked, vacuum, laundry, change bed linens, rotate towels, mop up to 3 times a day...yaddah yaddah yaddah.  The bottom line here is I feel like I'm cleaning all day...or at least 75% of the day.  When Brian is home my expectations change and I feel like I want to quit cleaning and let him take over.  The truth of the matter is that there is no break.  It's just life.  I like being home and I'm too controlling to let anyone else do the work for me.  It's just the monotony catches up to me sometimes.  Too often my thoughts are that of change, but when change comes I just want things to go back to being normal again.  But who doesn't get stuck in a rut right?  I guess it's been a while since my last rut.  It was back when Riley pooped my way out of it.  In hindsight I don't know what I was thinking posting those pictures.  What a disgusting post.

So back to my initial story.  I thought I'd be nice tonight and do the whole kitchen for Brian.  This way when we were done vegging he'd have nothing to do.  I on the other hand still had laundry to fold.  So now it's our bedtime and I went ahead upstairs to start my folding while he locked up.  When he came up I was sitting in the floor folding and he walked right past me and got into bed.  Que the "You're so lame" conversation.  My expectations were too high I guess.  I thought that he would help me, since I had done ALL of the house work today.  So yes, he did reach a new level of lame tonight.  I was disappointed.  He should be able to read my mind and know exactly what I want!  I'm kidding of course, but wouldn't it just make life that much easier?  If we didn't have to tell or ask our spouse what we wanted?  Lame or not lame he's still a good husband.  And I'm a good wife.  Especially since I decided to not whack him with the pillow.  He'll thank me for that in the morning. He'll also thank me for not getting an ear full of the same ole' same ole' at midnight.  So to my dear sweet (and occasionally lame ) husband:  You're Welcome.