Worst Shopping Trip Ever

I'm trying not to stew about this, although writing about it seems like a healthy outlet.  If you do not want to hear me venting you may as well not even bother reading this post as it will probably be a long one. 

First you should know a few things:

1)  When I go grocery shopping I take the kids with me.  I have no choice.  For this reason I shop at Wal-Mart, which I am really starting to hate.  I endure this madness for 2 reasons:  1)They have the cheapest diapers and 2)They have the big fancy buggies with the 2 bucket seats and the regular one for Riley.  This makes it very convenient for me to have all 3 kids confined to one spot.

2)  The fancy buggy comes with rules.  Rule #1 They (Ella and Aiden) do not have to be buckled in.  They have to ride as long as I am moving, but once I am in the isle they are free to roam.   Rule #2  If they require a time out they will get buckled in as punishment.  YES I do discipline my kids in public.  The rules are very simple, and Aiden is the only one who has ever required a time out.

3)  If there is anything else I hate more than "You've got your hands full."  It's people thinking that it's OK to discipline my kids for me.

And on with the Worst Shopping Trip Ever...

What started off as a very normal Wal-Mart trip ended up in a not-so-normal check out experience.  Since I let the kids help with throwing stuff in the buggy they managed to throw in a couple of extra stuff that I was not willing to pay for.  After calling the manager to void things off (which admittedly was my fault for not paying attention) they lady behind me was obviously getting flustered.  I know what she was thinking.  "I picked the wrong line."  Yes she did.  As 15 minutes pass the kids are getting more and more restless.  We had already been shopping for an hour anyway and enough is enough.  Riley starts to get fussy and Aiden starts to get crazy.  By crazy I mean by climbing into the ice box.  A passerby customer feels the need to tell him he doesn't need to be playing in there...yes, I know that.  I'm sorry he escaped me while I was tending to my crying baby.  This freeze out of his resulted in him being buckled in time out.  This did not bode well with him and he started screaming.  Ella put her hands over her ears.  The impatient woman behind me decides to talk to her sister in Spanish.  Little does she know my husband, who is fluent in Spanish, has taught me a thing or two.  Rude comments, no matter what language, are none the less NOT necessary.  Meanwhile we are still waiting on a manager.  Another passerby customer decides that she will come and talk to Aiden about Santa, he is still crying.  She thinks she is helping, but it only makes things worse.  He cries even more.  And I am starting to fume.  Lady, he's in time out.  Deal with it and keep on walkin'.  Now I can finally put my groceries in the buggy.  I typically give Riley the milk so she can shake the bag.  It makes her happy.  The cashier BEHIND me in the other isle tells me she doesn't need to be playing with that...she could suffocate.  'She's fine.'  I told her.  She's just shaking on the handle, she's not gonna die.  Geez...can I have the bad parent award please?  If I thought she was in danger, I would not have given it to her.  Not to mention, I'm right here.  I am getting ready to pay now and the woman behind me exclaims "So does this mean I get free groceries?  I've been standing here for an hour!"  So sorry to inconvenience you.  All she's been doing is standing, I'm the one dealing with kids here.  I wanted to turn to her and say 'Ma'm, you could have left at any time and gone to a different isle.'  There was no one behind her the entire time!  I did not respond to her snide comment.  I probably would have except it was obvious that her sister is going through cancer.  I did not feel it necessary to be rude to someone who was going through a rough time.  If only she had shown the same courtesy to me.  Why is it that you tend to be nicer to people less fortunate than yourself?  Shouldn't we just hold our tongue EVERY time?  I mean how did that lady behind me help the situation?  Not at all.  As I was leaving the woman who had checked me out said "I bet you haven't had a worse shopping experience have you?"  I wanted to tell her that it wasn't the worst, but I just smiled instead.  Putting the kids in the car also spouted a crying fit.  Riley started crying and Aiden too.  He was mad because I picked him up and put him in.  He wanted to do it himself.  An OLD woman  (at least 70...sorry but that's old to me) poked her head in the van and asked if she could help me by loading my groceries for me.  'I'm OK'  I told her.  As good as her intentions were my thoughts went to "I'm not the victim here, stop trying to help out!  The kids are having a fit...big deal.  I don't care if they cry, but apparently I am ruining the lives of many."  People of ChapinWal-Mart guy.  Relief.  He's just doing his job.  That kind of help is welcome.  'Thanks'  I told him.  Whether he was doing it because of the crying that was booming from my van or if he was collecting anyway I don't care.  He didn't address my kids and I was glad.  I don't need anyone else pointing out to me that my kids are crying.  It annoys me because I'm not out of control.  Aiden was in time out.  Riley was tired.  Period.  This was not about having melt downs for no reason.  I am not a bad parent so people please leave me alone.  I know what I'm doing. 

I'm done now.  This was helpful.  Now I don't feel so mad.  Too bad I'll have to go shopping again in a week.  YAY...

When It Rains, It Pours

Well we had a successful move.  The positives:  MORE SPACE!!  The kids each have their own room, they actually have a play room, there's plenty of hallway to run around in, big sliding glass doors that lead out to a screened porch and oh, yeah...the completely fenced in back yard equipped with play set and a little thing I like to call GRASS.  We have only ever known weeds and something that wants to be grass.  The kids love it.  While the unpacking isn't going as quickly as I would like it to, we're happy.

Since November has taken a turn on the warm side lately the kids have been able to go out and play on a regular basis.  So this morning wasn't anything out of the ordinary.  They ate breakfast, I bathed Riley, cleaned the kitchen and sent Ella and Aiden out to play.  They had been out for about ten minutes and I was getting ready to get Riley down for her nap.  I went to tell them I would be feeding Riley and they were already running towards the door.  Uh oh.  I know that look.  I've seen this look before.  Sheer panic is written all over Ella's face.  Ants. 

I immediately stripped her down (and Aiden too) and sent them upstairs to the shower.  I quickly scooped up Riley, plopped her down in Aiden's room with a toy, closed the gate at the top of the stairs and started the water for the kids.  Just as soon as I had turned the shower on I heard Riley crying (her pain cry).  She crawled into the bathroom and I saw blood on her hand.  I rinsed it in the sink thinking she had cut it on something and then (as it usually goes) I saw that it wasn't her hand...it was her mouth.  Oh, these are the worst.  I rinsed her mouth and the blood just kept coming.  I gave her a rag to chew on.  'Where is this coming from?'  Did she bite her tounge?  No.  Her lip?  No.  I turned her upside down and saw that it was that skin above the two front teeth that connects to the lip...you know the frenulum labii superioris.  My husband will be so proud!  Nah, who am I kidding...I Googled it.

In the midst of my 'every child a victim' moment, these were my thoughts:  Am I really alone right now?  Is it possible that Brian will magically appear and help me?  I don't know what to do!

In the mean time, Ella was crying because of her bites, Aiden was crying because Ella had the tiger and he wanted it and thankfully Riley was sitting quite contently drinking the sippy of water I had given her.  Can I just mention too that I was able to remove her dress without getting blood on it?  That's always a plus. 

I was able to get everybody bathed, dressed and Riley down for her nap all  in a matter of 30 minutes, although it felt like forever.  It doesn't matter how many times these types of things happen I still feel like I have no clue as to what I am doing.  These moments feel chaotic and I don't know who to help first.  It's funny how your brain can quickly access the situation and put your body into action.  I feel like I'm just here watching my body work and when it's over I feel surprised that I was able to pull it off, ALONE.  It's amazing these kids are still alive.  What's also amazing is that neither of them have had any sustainable injuries or ER visits.  Who knows though.  It's only 11 and they are running in circles around me now.  A fall or crash or head on collision is bound to happen here soon.

Hap-pee Halloween

So far I have found no perks to traveling alone.  Alone meaning without Brian.  We still have a few more days until we can officially move into our new house.  Unfortunately, this move can not happen soon enough.  Brian spent last week commuting two hours.  Now this may not seem like a big deal to some, but when he is gone from 6:30am-8:00pm it's a big deal to us.  Side note: the kids' bedtime is 7:30, so this puts a kink in our schedule.  Anyway, so instead of us sitting around in a boxed up house the whole time, I decided to take the kids to my mother's house in Georgia for a couple of days.  This saved us from getting cabin fever and saved Brian a lot of driving.

There have been four incidents now where we have gotten in the car, driven about 20 minutes and Ella announces that she has to go potty.  Thankfully, I have not been alone and we are able to stop at a gas station and one of us takes her in.  Well, about 45 minutes into our drive home from Georgia I hear those ill-timed words, "Mommy, I need to go potty."  I groaned.

With still over an hour more to drive, I knew that I could not hold her off until we got home.  I pulled into the nearest gas station.  I considered my options:

Option 1)  Leave Aiden and Riley in the van and lock the doors.  It'll take less than 5 minutes.  They'll be fine.  Well I ruled that out pretty quickly.  This is the kind of thing mothers get arrested for.

Option 2)  Unload all of the kids, put their shoes on and attempt to take Ella potty while holding Riley and keeping Aiden from crawling on the floor under the stalls.  Public restrooms are so disgusting.  I have a germ-a-phobia too, this cannot end well.  Next...

Option 3)  Scope out junk in the van and create a porta-potty.  I think I'll go with this one. 

An empty water bottle.  Nah, hole is too small.  Wipe box.  I could take all of the wipes out and she can pee in that.  Hey, it even has it's own lid!  Hmm, I'll consider that as Plan B.  A Halloween bucket.  BINGO!  Thank you Jack-in-the-Box for putting your Kid's Meals in a Halloween bucket!  I preceded to put my plan into action.  She squatted into the bucket (which she thought was funny and yet disturbing at the same time).  Luckily I had a gallon of water on hand as well.  I rinsed the bucket out a few times and dumped it into the grass.  Mission accomplished.  I didn't have to unload the kids and I didn't run the risk of getting arrested.  I pat myself on the back for thinking so quickly.  Like I said before, there are no perks to traveling alone.

Needless to say, that bucket's not going anywhere.  She may be squatting in it again soon.  Hap-pee Halloween!